By Linda "Eagle Culbreth

Is your teen one in three who will become a victim of dating
violence?
Here are Ten Tips for Parents to talk with their teen about - you
can empower your teen and here are some of the tools to help
you.
Before I give you the first ten tips, there are some things you and
your teen need to remember:
* You have the right to a healthy relationship.
* You deserve better. Do not put up with abuse.
* You are not alone. Teens from all backgrounds are in, have been
in, or know someone in an abusive relationship.
* you have done nothing wrong. It is not your fault that your
partner abuses you.
* The longer you stay in an abusive relationship, the more intense
the violence will become. It does not get better over time.
* Being drunk or high is not an excuse for abuse.
* No one is justified in attacking you just because he or she is
angry.
TIPS ON DATING VIOLENCE:
1. Abuse in a dating relationship can be confusing and frightening
at any age. But for teenagers, who are just beginning to date and
develop romantic relationships, this abuse is especially
difficult.
2. Surveys show dating violence is not uncommon among teens. When
the abuse is physical or sexual, it can be easy to identify.
Emotional abuse is much harder to recognize, but no less
damaging.
3. Dating violence can be tough to talk about honestly. It can be
uncomfortable to bring up and embarrassing to acknowledge. But with
dating violence a fact of life for many teen couples, we've got to
break the silence.
4. Sometimes it's easier to explore thoughts and feelings using
this kind of example than it is to talk about our own
experiences.
A Typical Dating Violence Scenario
Brenda is 15 and has never had a boyfriend before. She recently
started dating Frank. She thinks he is so cute. Her friends all
tell her how lucky she is because she has a boyfriend. At first,
Brenda thought it was sweet that Frank began calling her all the
time. He always wants to know whom she is with, where she is, and
when she'll be home. He has told her that she was meant to be with
him and him only, forever.
Recently, Frank has started belittling her in front of his friends,
insulting her, and telling her she is fat. He doesn't want her to
spend time with certain of her friends - he thinks they are a bad
influence. He threatens to break up with her if she won't do what
he says, and that no one else will ever want her. Brenda wants to
make Frank happy. In fact, she'll do anything to keep her
boyfriend. She things this is what being in a relationship is all
about.
5. Relationship violence often starts as emotional or verbal abuse
and can quickly escalate into physical or sexual violence. And
although many teens know of at least one student who has been a
victim of relationship violvence, most parents either don't know it
exists or don't know it is an issue.
6. Relationship Violence is a pattern of behavior used by someone
to maintain control over his or her partner.
7. Relationship violence can take the form of verbal, physcial,
emotional, or even sexual abuse.
8. Relationship Violence is not about getting angry or having a
disagreement.
9. In an abusive relationship one partner is afraid of and
intimidated by the other.
10. How often does it happen?
24% of severe injuries and deaths occuse when the victim is tryng
to leave or has already left the relationship.
Relationhsip violence is the number one cause of injury to women
between the ages of 15-44.
63% of date rape victims are young women between the ages of 14 and
17.
70% of pregnant teenagers are abused by their partners.
Parents who have found these tips helpful often sign up for the
newsletter and order the parent-teen home study course: Date A
Hero, Not A Zero at
http://www.eaglesport.biz
Be Safe & Empower Your Teen to Be Safe!
About The Author
Linda "Eagle" Culbreth
Former teacher & school administrator, mother, grandmother,
suvivor of abuse at the hands of someone who was supposed to love
and care for me. You may freely use this article as long as you
include this information and the fact that Linda "Eagle" Culbreth
has a home study course for parents and teens on dating violence at
http://www.eaglesport.biz
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